@Antonia jones yeah, it's from cognitive behavioral therapy. And like I said the weirdest part of it is how the words matter more than the meaning you intend.

So for instance saying "Of course I deserve love and affection" sarcastically does actually help your mental state even if it's just another way of saying you don't.

I struggled hard for a very long time with critically low self-esteem and self-worth, I'm not going to pretend this is some easy light switch... it's just something that nudges things over time... like it might take years to really turn around, but it matters because those are years where you'd otherwise be getting worse.

The other big advice, and a rule I sometimes struggle to follow but has been huge in my development: never reject or dismiss a complement. You don't have to accept it or believe it, but never brush it off.