So last night, for the first time, I've heard the label Severely Deficient Autobiographical Memory (SDAM), and through it also found Overgeneral Autobiographical Memory (OGM)... both of which are labels for something that's distressed me for a long time...
While it doesn't make it any less distressing, it does make it easier to communicate, find other people with similar experiences, and just generally make it less a vague thing I'm dealing with.
In my own words: I don't really feel like I keep my life... I struggle with individual memories, and where I do remember things it's vague and more a third person academic understanding that it happened. I don't relive those moments when I think about them, I just kinda know they happened.
It feels like every day is page one of the story and my whole life prior is exposition rather than something I was really there for...
Definitions as I understand them: SDAM - Memories are impersonal and without detail, described in some places as "third person perspective". This means you can remember an event happens, but when remembering you can't see much detail and can't relive feelings.
OGM - Instead of recalling specific events, it means you mostly only recall general memories like repeated events or things that span over extended periods. ie. with someone you talk to often being able to remember "how the conversations go" but you struggle to communicate specifics about any one conversation.
This is the first I hear of OGM.... and it might actually help explain the other side of my memory... I thought those 2 things would be the same but it's good to know they're not...
@Gwen, the Fops yeah, made last night into a double oof for me. At first I thought they were maybe different terms for the same thing but dug a little deeper and it's two completely different things that together basically leave you one step away from amnesia 😅
I have a task reminder on my phone for showers because I don't really feel it until it gets grimy (and my sense of smell is kinda broken). Plus I had to dish out a subscription to one because it's the rare task app that does relative deadlines (ie. instead of every 3 days for a task, it's 3 days since the task was last completed), because time blindness and memory issues means if I miss a reminder I can convince myself I just did it yesterday when it was actually a week ago. But a reminder where I actually did it yesterday just leads to me ignoring the reminder. On top of all that is the executive dysfunction where I can get distracted and just not do things until I don't have the spoons to do them.
State of my apartment is painfully shameful and is a reflection of my stress and depression... I simply don't have the spoons to keep up with all but the most critical of cleaning. It's a lot of executive function spoons to start cleaning in the first place, let alone juggle the array of things to clean. That's before even getting to the physical exhaustion and pain of standing and bending all coming from my physical disability.
... If you've visited me in my home, know that I'm ashamed and just swallowing it because the isolation is worse than the shame.
Why drugs are wreaking havoc on the prison system – Channel 4 News
Methods the drugs are coming in include drones & being thrown over the wall. I can see the possibility of prisons needing to be covered by netting. channel4.com/news/why-drugs-ar…
But the veil offers one things the interlopers will never provide. Ṕ̵͈̞͕̫̀ͯ̋ͤͪ̀̉̃ͦ͢͡͞ṙo̒_̸̨̛̳̟̟̯̟͂̅̊̔͊ͯ̑͌̌̌͝ͅtę̦̱̠̹͛͗ͫͫ̂̕͠cti̛͎͚̟̫̱͕̥̠̐ͣͦ̈́͊͗ô̘̯̈́ͨ̂ͬ̌̿̌̎͝n͕̮͙̺ͦ̄.
Gwen moved to transfem social
in reply to Shiri Bailem • • •Shiri Bailem
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