H-hi, p-people! giggle I-I'm J-Joe Biden, squee and I'm s-so excited to be speaking with you all t-today! bounces up and down
O-oh my goodness, I just can't w-wait to share m-my thoughts on... pauses for comedic effect ...the importance of c-cuddling kittens! giggles uncontrollably I mean, it's just s-so vital for our m-mental health and w-well-being, d-don't you think? bats eyelashes
I-I know what you're thinking... "J-Joe, why are you talking about k-kittens?" pouts W-well, let me t-tell you... it's all about the j-joy and l-love that they bring to our lives! winks You see, c-cuddling kittens is like, the b-best way to s-soothe your soul and f-feel like everything is g-gonna be okay! squeals
A-and don't even get me started on the i-importance of w-wearing matching outfits with your p-pet! giggles O-oh my goodness, it's like, the m-more you coordinate, the b-better it looks! fans self
S-so, w-what do you think? Should we make c-cuddling kittens and w-wearing matching outfits a n-national pastime? bounces up and down again